VAMPIRE DIARIES!

i’ll meet you soon on the pages of another vampireworld

Is this what I really want?

It has been a very busy month and sadly writing just went out of my system. I’ve grown distant to a lot of people. I felt being alone is what I need though I tried my hardest to interact with others. During most of my days, I helped Mom in our little business, went home around 7pm or so. Chat with my sister, watch television for an hour, grab a book and read until my eyes get all cloudy and tired. That’s what I’ve been doing. I got a second hand mobile phone that seldom receives messages but I don’t really mind, I sometimes forgot where I’d placed it anyway. I just finished reading DEAR JOHN by Nicholas Sparks and it was so moving I have tears until the last page and I asked myself 

“IS THIS WHAT I REALLY WANT?”

I sucked. During the first part of the decision making, I was so sure I want it. I talked it out among my sisters and my mom and they all agreed to it. We are no rich. We’re just a normal family that has a little bit more that the ordinary. I know you know what I mean. I really want it 2 months ago and now I don’t know. Studying again is a great a thing but being away with my parents and my friends and my dogs isn’t a good thing. My sister just got her visa and will be leaving first week of January as for me, it’s still a long process. I am not sure if I am ready. As I finished the book last night maybe I was drowning in a very emotional state that I thought about things that I really want, it happens right? I am not saying that the story of the book has something to do with my indecisions, it was a heart-warming love story that didn’t end like other fairytales but it was choosing the happiness of someone you love over your own.

   So that story made me cry, and no I was still crying until the wee hours trying to sum up everything. What if it’s not what I really want? Who will look after my father who is sick or help my mom handling the business? Who will look after my dogs when they become sick too? What if every single centavo we spent for my papers go to waste? Will my mother blame me for being such a persuasive little hard-headed me? Yes I want that course and yes I want it too badly that I over think for most part. Now I am lost again in a maze I made myself. Isn’t that cool?

my christmas wishlist :)

haha of course meron ako nyan, i dont want anything extravagant :p just books.

HARRY POTTER SERIES 

(bwahaha sobrang huling huli na ako, ayaw ko kasi nito dati pero bigla kong nagustuhan, binasa ko ung book 1 then i watched the movie 1-6 so i ended up reading the book 7. Oh adik lang db?

CRESENDO by: Becca Fitzpatrick

( hindi pa ata nailalabas tong sequel ng Hush, Hush, pero gusto ko naaa haha TEAM VAMPIRES pa rin pero walang masama liking PATCH CIPRIANO

HAVE A LITTLE FAITH by: Mitch Albom

( i know this is another inspiring book from Albom kaya its a MUST-HAVE)

DEAR JOHN by Nicholas Sparks

( sadly hindi ko pa nababasa ito, ginawa ng movie di ko pa rin nabasa.tsk)

THE LAST SONG by Nicholas Sparks

 :( i read Ate Kg’s book review on this, pero di ko pa rin nabasa nakita ko na sa NBS sayang next time

SAM’S LETTER TO JENNIFER by James Patterson

( crazy bout this! )

LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLERA by Gabriel García Márquez

( Canky suggested this book kaya coming from her syempre nasa list ko yan

EAT PRAY, LOVE by Elizabeth Gilbert

( may movie na nito another recommended book from canky  

THE TIME TRAVELLERS WIFE by Audrey Niffenegger

( *sobs* gusto ko na talaga toooooooooooo!)

BY THE RIVER PIEDRA I SAT DOWN AND WEPT by Paulo Coelho

( i’ve read a part, never finish it. hiniram ko lang kasi ung book haha! )

THE WITCH OF PORTOBELLO by Paulo Coelho

( recommended by my friend Lou Anne

That’s it so far! hehehe. I saw a blog entitled “The Chic that Reads” cool reviews

thats all i asked :)

Being a BUM is sometimes okay hehe anyway i was “facebooking” kanina when my friend Lou-Anne tagged me on her note about christmas wish list and she asked us (all her friends that she tagged) to leave a comment on her note. Nung time na magcocomment na ako kasi sabi ko madali lang naman un, i got loads of wishes pero nung magtatype na ako wala akong maitatype like what the hey! ang dami kong naiisip na gusto ko sa christmas tapos biglang poof! nawala. So i stopped and think. i was thinking to hard that i felt my temporal is pulsating na pala. Naku sabi ko nasakit bigla ulo ko. THEN may naisip ako. remember the reason (nung una pa) kung bakit ako may blog. I promised myself not to talk about him pero kasi few weeks ago i added that boy sa facebook. read this entry?well its too late na para ierase ko pa. 

 but then i did’nt click the comment button. I felt a surge of strength to decide na kausapin yung tao na un. i closed my eyes when i reached his page. Do i really want to talk to him? What will happen if hindi sya sumagot? Would i feel rejected? Disappointed? Ashame? argh bahala na. whats wrong na kumustahin mo yung isa tao after 3 dreaded years. So i DID. i sent a message to that person praying na magrereply sya.

3 minutes later…

5 minutes later…

15 minutes later…

30minutes later…

1 hour later…

1 hour and 15 minutes..

1 hour and 49 minutes….

 click for upsize coke float LOL

 never been happy. yung totoong happy haha. 5 minutes. Right. THATS ALL I EVER WANTED. 

exs: this entry is not posted for “romantic” reason. its just that im happy that i finally could reconnect with him. nothing more nothing less. BELIEVE ME. he’s just one of the best guys i’ve ever met. He loves deeply and that solely made him one of the very few remaining guys out there who can make any ordinary girl the world’s luckiest.

STOP.PLEASE READ.

I NEED TO FIND THE SWEETEST SONGS ABOUT “WAITING” “FOUND LOVE” “DESTINY” ANY SONGS THAT WOULD DESCRIBE THE WHIRLWIND ROMANCE THAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY BESTFRIEND AND HER BESTFRIEND! I AM PRACTICALLY CRAMING AND LOST RIGHT NOW BECAUSE ME AND MY OTHER BESTFRIEND HAVE ROUGHLY TWO EFFIN WEEK TO PREPARE A GIFT FOR THEM. SUGGESTIONSSSSSSS! KEEP COMING! NEED HELP ON THIS. 

FIRST, WHERE CAN I RENT A PROJECTOR? PROJECTOR BA UN? GEEZ WERE PLANNING ON GIVING THEM A POWERPOINT PRESENTATION, THE ONE YOU PUT SA LAPTOP AND IT GOES TO THE WALL BASTA IM SORRY IM ACTUALLY NOT SANE TODAY HEHE.

NEXT, A SONG BY BRANDY ENTITLED LONG DISTANCE OKAY YUN DB KASI THE BESTFRIEND OF MY BESTFRIEND WHO FELL DEEPLY AND CRAZILY INLOVE WITH HER IS IN CANADA RIGHT NOW. AND HE’S COMING HOME ON THE 23RD! 

HERE’S A LINE 

“THIS LONG DISTANCE IS KILLING ME”

COOL SWEET AND JUST RIGHT.

GOOD JOB GRACIE
:d

yep yep gcie and me will be working closely together to make the 27th extra special right BFFg haha!

THERE. IM STUCKED WITH THAT SONG I CAN THINK OF ANY, (YEINE BREATH!) 

ANY OTHER SUGGESTION FOR OUR WEDDING GIFT FOR THEM? NAISIP KO UNA ILL MAKE A SCRAPBOOK PERO I HAVE TOO LITTLE TIME I ACTUALLY HAVE THEIR PICTURES NA RIN PALA AND ANG DAMI DAMI. NOW IM HAVING A HARD TIME ASKING MY BESTFRIEND’S MOM FOR HER BABY PICTURE KASI MADALDAL UN HAHA BAKA MASABI SO DI NA SURPRISE.TSK. AND WHAT DRIVES ME MORE CRAZY IS HOW TO GET A BABY PICTURE OF HER BESTFRIEND!!! DANG. I DONT HAVE ANY CONNECTION IN EITHER FS OR FB NG MGA KAPATID NUNG GUY. WEEE IM SO DEAD.

SORRY SUPER WALA AKO NGAYON. I WANT TO CRY KASI WITNESS AKO SA PAIN, SACRIFICES, SA JOY NILA TOGETHER, IM PLANNING TO SHARE THEIR INSPIRING STORY SOON AFTER THE WEDDING HELP ME HELP ME!!!